Friday Five – November 30, 2012

This week’s Friday Five:

  1. What area of your life has lately (and pleasantly) been on cruise control? Work has been steady, uneventful and almost carefree for the past month.
  2. Where in your life should you probably hit the brakes? My emoti onal attachment to people could really use a little toning down.
  3. Where do you go when you just need a little tune-up? The beach. There is nothing more soothing than waves kissing the shore.
  4. How much junk have you got in the trunk? More than I’d like, but enough to be healthy.
  5. Where is the needle on your fuel gauge pointing today? It’s Friday, it’s payday, and I’m going to see one of my favourite bands tonight. I’m solidly on F.

Change Is Constant

Things change over time.

Sometimes, it’s for the better. Actually, I’d venture to say that MOST times it’s for the better. Circumstances that seem less than ideal are often the ones the promote the most growth, the most insight into ones’ true self and the most happiness in the long run.

At the risk of being incredibly vague, I’m at a crossroads in my life and I’m figuring out which path is the right one for me. It’s a little scary and little exciting. However, I believe in things happening for a reason. Every experience takes us closer to where our journey is meant to lead.

So in the spirit of a possible new beginning, here’s a new title, a new layout, and (hopefully) a new outlook.

Music Monday – November 12, 2012

All Too Well
-Taylor Swift

I walked through the door with you, the air was cold
But something about it felt like home somehow
And I left my scarf there at your sister’s house
And you still got it in your drawer, even now

Oh, your sweet disposition and my wide-eyed gaze
We’re singing in the car getting lost upstate
Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place
And I can picture it after all these days

And I know it’s long gone
And that magic’s not here no more
And I might be okay
But I’m not fine at all

‘Cause there we are again, on that little town street
You almost ran the red ’cause you were looking over me
Wind in my hair, I was there, I remember it all too well

Photo album on the counter, your cheeks were turning red
You used to be a little kid with glasses in a twin-size bed
Your mother’s telling stories about you on the tee ball team
You tell me about your past, thinking your future was me

And I know it’s long gone
And there’s nothing else I could do
And I forget about you long enough
To forget why I needed to

‘Cause there we are again, in the middle of the night
We’re dancing around the kitchen in the refrigerator light
Down the stairs, I was there, I remember it all too well

And maybe we got lost in translation, maybe I asked for too much
But maybe this thing was a masterpiece ’til you tore it all up
Running scared, I was there, I remember it all too well

And you call me up again just to break me like a promise
So casually cruel in the name of being honest
I’m a crumpled up piece of paper lying here
‘Cause I remember it all, all, all too well

Time won’t fly, it’s like I’m paralyzed by it
I’d like to be my old self again, but I’m still trying to find it
After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own
Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone

But you keep my old scarf from that very first week
‘Cause it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me
You can’t get rid of it ’cause you remember it all too well, yeah

‘Cause there we are again, when I loved you so
Back before you lost the one real thing you’ve ever known
It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well

Wind in my hair, you were there, you remember it all
Down the stairs, you were there, you remember it all
It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well

Friday Five – November 9th, 2012

This week’s Friday Five:

  • When was someone or something recently Too Close for Comfort? My coworkers are the touchy-feely type and that doesn’t always fly with me.
  • Besides yourself, who’s recently been in Double Trouble? Boyfriend. As always.
  • What’s Happening? I’m having a moody night and just unplugging from the world.
  • Who’s the Boss? Me. Always me.
  • What are you most likely to be up to from 9 to 5 tomorrow? Working 7:30-12:30, then off to get a birthday present for Mama!

Music Monday – November 5, 2012

Red
-Taylor Swift

Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street
Faster than the wind, passionate as sin, ending so suddenly
Loving him is like trying to change your mind once you’re already flying through the free fall
Like the colors in autumn so bright just before they lose it all

Losing him was blue, like I’d never known
Missing him was dark grey, all alone
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you’ve never met
But loving him was red
Loving him was red

Touching him was like realizing all you ever wanted was right there in front of you
Memorizing him was as easy as knowing all the words to your old favorite song
Fighting with him was like trying to solve a crossword and realizing there’s no right answer

Regretting him was like wishing you never found out that love could be that long
Losing him was blue, like I’d never known
Missing him was dark grey, all alone
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met
But loving him was red, oh red, burning red

Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes
Tell myself it’s time now gotta let go
But moving on from him is impossible when I still see it all in my head
in burning red
Burning, it was red

Losing him was blue, like I’d never known
Missing him was dark grey, all alone
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you’ve never met
Cause loving him was red, yeah yeah red, burning red

And that’s why he’s spinning around in my head
Comes back to me in burning red

Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street

(This has been stuck in my head for days and reminds me completely of my first love. – T)

It's About Time

It’s been months since I actually took a few minutes to blog, so here’s a brief timeline of 2012, since my last post:

April :: gave up on giving up on Boy. We started texting. Found out a good friend’s brother was secretly in love with me.

May :: went on a date-type thing with Boy. Stayed up all night talking to him. Kissed him. Got epically blown off.

June :: met a new Boy. He let me drive his brand new truck less than an hour after meeting him. We became inseperable. Baby girl graduated kindergarten. New Boy and I went on a date. Spent two Fridays in a row talking till 5am. Had our first kiss. I got drunk and tried to seduce him. He insisted on sober consent. I confessed my rape to him. He held me and let me cry and never once blamed me. I started to fall for him.

July :: Boy met kiddo. Boy and i became official. I turned 27. Boy turned 34. Boy met my parents, brother and grandma.

August :: random summer fun with kiddo, BFF and BF. I don’t definitively remember any of August.

September :: BF and I survived the first fight. I ran my first 6k, as a fundraiser for the women’s shelter. Kiddo started grade one. I survived my rapist coming back to work. I realised I’m in love with boyfriend.

October :: life continued along well. Boyfriend and kiddo and boyfriend’s kiddo are all fantastic.

Life is so good right now.